PM Monoid Adopts Stop-Motion Cheese Eating Plasticine Avatar

Christian Cawley
Artist's impression of how PM Monoid's plasticine avatar might appear

Prime Minister Monoid has completed a radical makeover aimed at making his physical appearance more appealing, according to Downing Street insiders.

While his one-eyed appearance is believed to dissuade voters, the more natural pallid texture and addiction to Wensleydale is considered “endearing” say Downing Street sources, who admit to referring the matter to various focus groups.

Finally, the PM will adopt the name “Boris Johnson” in tribute to the amusing broadsheet hack who mysteriously disappeared five years ago under the weight of alimony payments, court cases, and a box of whiff-whaff bats.

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